"I can barely bring myself to type it, let alone say it out loud. My beautiful, perfect baby boy more than likely has autism. I keep hoping I'm wrong, hoping I'm just being an overreacting mum but I know that's not the case.
In the last few months it's become more & more apparent that River isn't the same as his peers. The other toddlers will interact with each other- or at least look & stare at each other. Other toddlers will smile at people, & show them their toy, but River's never brought one of his toys to me or instigated any sort of interaction. That's ok, I thought- he's just not a people person.
Then all of his friends started talking, saying their first words, & River said nothing. That's ok, I thought. He's just a late talker. Boys talk later than girls. No need to worry until he's at least 2.
But he doesn't point at things. He doesn't clap. He doesn't wave. He doesn't look at what I'm pointing at. He doesn't smile at people. Doesn't do any imaginary play. He spends most of his day running up & down the living room, watching the TV. He hates noisy places like toddler groups. He doesn't understand basic things like, "Where is the light?" "Where are the nappies?" He is obsessed with spinning anything & everything.
He doesn't kiss me. He's never kissed me
I'm just devastated. I know it'll be a long road to a diagnosis but I just know he's autistic. I keep wondering what the future will hold for him. We live in the village that my OH grew up in & have been so excited about River attending the same primary school that my OH once did- will that ever happen now? Will he ever experience love? It's just too much. Xx"